a city that bloomed me open
It’s fascinating when difficult astrological transits come and I generally know what they represent but having them visible without noise and in a beautiful place changes the healing that can arise.
Amsterdam is a city that is beautiful, romantic, and the people alongside me where perfect synastry by the stars. & isn’t that how it should always be?
My 12h, 1h, were lit up while Chiron was conjunct the north node in Aries.
What the heck does that mean— the 12 house is often referred to a mind of isolation, mental health, hidden enemies (often times the self), spirituality, and i would like to invite uncovered or subconscious + programming.
First house — the ego and not on the negative connotation but all the bits and pieces that makes us — us. How we present and take up space in the world, but also how the world allows us to take up space & what we do with that invitation. Having Mercury retrograding here and Venus in the 12th can lead to difficult criticisms that often I don’t realize are so loud.
Chiron and north node — Chiron is the wounded healer within — we struggle to heal it until we help others heal these very wounds through conversations or experiencing life or however. These are deep childhood wounds that have festered and through communing with others do we start to unravel it. The north node is said to be a lunar placement of destiny, fate and it happens to both be in Aries at this time which is the sign that rules the first house (ego) the baby discovering world through their own eyes.
Sometimes the sun and the moon struggle to exist. Everything doesn’t not always have to be created in eclipses. Humans refuse to learn the tails of the sky. There is love in allowing each to be seen and experienced with their own splendor at their own time. Sun folks can often want me to be the sun when I am the moon, with the rings of the sign highlighting behind it. I do not always wish to be permeated in a solar eternity but ample in all of my phases and left to be seen by the naked eye or the dedication of those using telescopes.
there reasons we cannot look directly at the sun — feeling it is enough. Many times we burn are eyes to see what is already felt. The moon doesn’t burn eyes she simply is to be gazed upon and to move you from within as we are all mostly water.
Amsterdam with new friends was and perhaps continuous to be its countermeasure and illumination.
We are in a season of retrogrades and sometimes it’s not exes that appear during Venus and Mercury it’s the frequency and what parts of them can be used perhaps to heal with others simultaneously. Sometimes it takes art, olde architecture, dangerous bike lanes, and drinks to allow vulnerability to exist. Away from the noise and at times ongoing pains of our daily lives.
To romanticize in unison and be in love — now — with life while partaking in it with others. This is the intimacy I live to be exist in. I question why there isn’t enough space in our daily lives for this stream of intimacy. Too live in life without it being defined in physicalities but words, action, affirmation and recognition.
Breakfast with curiosities and discoveries of selves. Sharing ourselves with others more than willing to know more what a gift. Dinner that is a deja vu, a familiarity, between strangers.
Boleros playing—telling tales of love and desire and reminders of childhood, perhaps future loves as well—in a souvenir shop.
Coming back home to America ot was as if the time warp and world of delight abruptly ended.
Amsterdam is beautiful twofold because we were all there, together, in a discovery of self with the city. When the world is burning this pockets of passionate living and curiosity are what often has kept me going.
