Forgive and Forage VII
I have been holding onto a pain that no longer belongs to me.
Hanging on to yesterday's forgotten forgiveness of vulnerability, being the crime that ultimately led to a murder of my emotional capability and intelligence.
I have been settling for ounces of love, but I am an ocean reaking cruelty to a heart sunken to the sandy bottom of hopelessness.
Craving for pirates to pass me by and no longer use me as a decoration.
i have been traveling into the waves of introspection. Listening to this voice once
placed on mute.
"love thy self and he will
know how to when he sees you"
These sweet tooth a for love have been increasing beyond my capability to see each passer by as prospect.
"what are you so afraid of?" -Maru
This vanishing feeling that may not need to be duplicated. I may not feel this high on an unhealthy addiction again. I've been looking for my self love in all the wrong places, so I got lost in love with him.
Digging into the depths of the ocean to find my affection again. I spoke to this hostage heart and asked, why fear the unknown? When starving for a future to prove not all is so dim.
Foraging into my chest to reactivate, I forgive myself for loving earthquakes when they could not help but tear me into pieces.
Accepting emotional drought when I am a Tsunami. Taking on Arctic temperatures when affection was required. Defensive when truces were requested. I am abbrasive when lovers have attempted to heal me.
I open my scarred healing heart and say, "with this embrace of amorous imperfection, I Release these anchors to the wind."
Love me fully- to dear self and others or leave me hastily. I am ready.